4 Ways to Change Your Mindset If You're Feeling Stuck

If you’re itching for a fresh start, but don’t feel like you’re in the right headspace to get going, you’ve come to the right place. Sometimes it’s easy to daydream about being the best version of ourselves, whether that’s regularly exercising and eating well or quitting habits that we know don’t serve us. The hard part is….well, actually doing it. The good news: You can work with the mindset you have and make subtle behavior shifts that still allow you to get closer to your goals. 

We spoke with experts about how to change your mindset, no matter where you’re starting from or where you want to go. Check out their pro tips below.

Why Having the Right Mindset Matters

“Our mindset determines so much of how we show up in the world—and what we do,” says April Rinne, author of Flux: 8 Superpowers for Thriving in Constant Change. But that isn’t to say you’re always going to magically have an I’ve-got-this mindset. Sometimes, it might require a little mental gymnastics to get yourself to a better, more constructive place. 

“A lot of times, people think that you have to change your mindset and your beliefs before you change your behavior,” says social psychologist Mary Murphy, PhD, professor in the department of psychological and brain sciences at Indiana University Bloomington and author of the forthcoming book Cultures of Growth. “But we know from psychology and cognitive dissonance theory that you don't have to change your beliefs before you change your behavior. And, in fact, when it comes to health, wellness, and fitness, oftentimes it's about changing our behavior first, and our beliefs will follow.” 

4 Ways to Change Your Mindset

Navigating around your current mindset blockers is easier than you might think, no matter what refrain is playing in your head at the moment. Here’s how to change your mindset and your behaviors, depending on the frame of mind you currently have: 

If You Have an I’m-Too-Far-Gone Mindset, Adopt a Growth and Beginner Mindset

If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “I’m so far away from reaching my goals that there’s no use even getting started” or “I’m just not good at exercise,” then you may have what experts call a fixed mindset. “A fixed mindset holds that you either have something or you don't,” Murphy says. “So, you're either good at something or you're not. This is a big barrier to progress and development because if you don't think that you can change—‘This is just who I am, it's who I've always been, and who I'm always going to be’—then there's no motivation to take any steps to actually experiment and see if it's possible to change.” And it’s this type of thinking that can keep you stuck.

The fix: Rinne says a growth mindset (“I can grow, improve, and evolve”) coupled with a “beginner’s” mindset (“I approach life with curiosity and do not assume that I have, or even should have, all the answers”) is the best recipe for success. “They are the foundation upon which you can boost your ability to thrive amid constant change, uncertainty, and unknowns,” Rinne says.

Another method to chip away at a fixed mindset, says Murphy, is to reflect on other times when you’ve made progress and surprised yourself. Maybe it was overcoming stage fright and giving a speech in front of a lot of people, or maybe it was the first time you ran a mile without stopping. Don’t just focus on the outcome, she says, but think back on what the journey was like to get there. “It's the process that we want to emulate to get us going with a little bit of momentum,” Murphy says. 

If You Have a Perfectionist, All-or-Nothing Mindset, See the Value in Starting Small

If you’re the type to skip workouts because you can’t commit to a full hour, then you might have a perfectionist mindset that tells you if you can’t do it all perfectly, there’s no use even doing a little. Of course, that couldn’t be further from the truth. 

“There's absolutely no shame in doing a five- or 10-minute class,” Murphy says. In fact, a 2022 study in the European Heart Journal found that just 15–20 minutes of heart-pumping, vigorous exercise weekly can help extend one’s lifespan, including lower incidence of cardiovascular disease and cancer among the study participants.

The fix: Give yourself grace and be honest about your patterns. “If you know you’re the type to throw in the towel when things aren’t perfect, make a proactive plan ahead of time,” Murphy suggests. “Ask yourself: ‘What am I going to do when I find myself in these moments?’” Instead of willing yourself to be different, accept this is where your mind tends to go and have a mantra that helps rein you back in. Murphy suggests something like, “Every moment is a new opportunity to make progress towards this goal.” 

Then, says Rinne, start small. After all, “10 minutes, or even one minute, is better than zero minutes,” she says. “This is the case when it comes to workouts as well as anything that really matters.”

If You Have a Negative, This-Really-Sucks Mindset, Find a More Neutral (Not Positive) Attitude

Let’s face it: Making changes that improve our health isn’t always fun. Your body may feel sore after a workout, or you may want to snooze your alarm rather than tackle your morning sweat sesh. It’s normal to not love everything about the changes you’re trying to make, but if you’re hung up on the negative and find that every workout or healthy meal feels like a punishment, then you may have found yourself locked in a negative mindset.

The fix: Don’t push yourself to be too positive if you’re just not there yet. Murphy suggests starting with the phrase, “Can I just?” Can I just put on my workout clothes? Can I just fill up my water bottle? Can I just eat this one healthy meal? Can I just jump on the bike for 5 minutes? “False positivity and trying to get all the way to ‘I love this! This is wonderful!’ isn’t realistic in moments when you’re resentful or frustrated,” Murphy says. “‘Can I just’ isn’t too positive, but it does get you moving.” And, over time, once you get going, you probably won’t be ready to stop once those five minutes are up. 

If You Have a Prevention Mindset, Embrace a Promotion Mindset

It’s common to set goals with a “prevention mindset” and not even realize you’re doing it. So if you say you’re changing your diet because you’re prediabetic and are trying to prevent diabetes, or you’re committing to strength training to decrease your risk of falls, you may see your health and fitness goals as only a means to prevent something bad from happening. But that kind of thinking often doesn’t motivate us to get going. 

One study in the journal Health Psychology found that people were more likely to quit smoking and lose more weight during a six-month follow-up period if they had a promotion mindset instead of a prevention mindset at the start. (However, once they reached their goals, a prevention mindset helped them maintain their progress.) 

The fix: If you focus more on the benefits of the new behaviors you’re adopting, you’re more likely to stick with them, Murphy says. If you’ve only started running or cycling to lower your risk of heart disease, for example, look at it as an opportunity to discover new things, like the way it energizes you, helps you sleep better, or puts you in a happier mood. “The goal is to learn more about yourself and to find ways to make it pleasurable,” Murphy says. Because the more we do things we actually enjoy, the more likely we are to keep doing them.

The Takeaway

No matter what your mindset is right now, know this: You don’t have to change it completely to get going on your goals. Work with your current mood and state of mind, not against it. Small changes in mindset happen when you don’t try to force yourself to be positive and motivated all the time. Let yourself off the hook and just get started. You’ll be pleasantly surprised to see how your mind will follow suit.

This content is for informational and educational purposes only and does not constitute individualized advice. It is not intended to replace professional medical evaluation, diagnosis, or treatment. Seek the advice of your physician for questions you may have regarding your health or a medical condition. If you are having a medical emergency, call your physician or 911 immediately.